Sometimes we get very caught up with buzz words and it creates or complicates what is really simple stuff, which is why today I want to talk about ‘mindset.’
Firstly though, what comes to mind for you when you think about mindset? Do you have an idea of what it is, what creates it, how it impacts on the things that you do each and every day? Or, is it something you haven’t thought a lot about, and especially not in the context of hockey.
Hockey is a sport after all, so why would mindset have anything to do with it, right?
The Basic Principle
Well, the basic principle of mindset is to think about what you think. And that’s a funny way of describing it I know, but that is what mindset is all about; your thoughts or thinking patterns and habits.
When you are a child growing up there are a load of things that influence what you think and feel. And I am going to add the feelings or emotions into this conversation as it’s important.
I like to consider a child’s mind this great big blank canvas and each and every interaction they have, starting from the day they are born has an impact.
If they were born in a hospital room with bright lights and lots of noise, the first thing they may have felt is scared. You think this doesn’t matter, as they were to young to remember it, no that’s not correct.
Each and every time something in their subconscious reminds them of that moment, they will feel scared, be scared. And naturally because in that very first moment they didn’t know how to react, or act, and to know that they were safe and okay, they won’t know how to respond now.
What I am trying to explain is that so many little things may have an impact on your child’s ability to be free and happy and do what they do without any fear, or trepidation, that even just to understand this is a big thing. And, a huge support for your child.
So many young children are fearless, and that is the best way for them to be. Then along comes us, the parent with our stories of what’s dangerous, our fear of getting hurt, falling, being injured etc., and we load that onto out child, unknowingly of course.
But it does have an impact on their mindset.
Mind Set Is Different
I’m sure you as a parent have struggled through those “Terrible Two’s” where your child decided they were independent and wanted to do things there own way.
So many fun stories to share about those times I’m sure.
And yet, this can be the time when a child’s mind becomes set. They decide that something MUST be done a certain way, for whatever reason, and we don’t really need to know the WHY. Just to recognize they have a strong belief, which is what a thought pattern that is strongly believed is, is enough.
This can also be a child getting into the space of believing they can’t do something. They have their own story about WHY and they believe it.
How To Provide Your Child With Support
The whole idea of me talking about this with you is not so you can chastise them or yell at them and tell them to stop being that way. What I want to do is help you to realize how the smallest thing can impact on a mindset.
Realizing this may help you to notice when you think they are caught in a belief or thought space.
The best thing to do is to have a conversation that starts with “I notice… [you are struggling with that activity, want to talk to me about it?]
This will open up a conversation in which you can listen for the underlying thinking that may be going on in their mind. The things they won’t openly tell you about, because often they are unaware of the thought patterns themselves until we shed some light on them.
If you have any specific situations that you would like to walk through, please message me and I can talk you through how you could approach that situation.
This works for children of any age.
Karen Cherrett is a Sports Mindset Coach who specializes in coaching hockey players. Karen coaches players to be more focused and play with ease, not stress. And their parents to support their child in the best possible way. Life playing hockey should be fun. Mindset matters. Mental health matters. Hockey should be fun, not emotionally overloading.